"It's not Mine, so it's not responsibility"

One of the most important things (in my mind) on this Earth, are children. I melt when I hear a child's laugh, I want to cry when I hear a child cry....they are the most innocent beings and seeing life through their eyes is truly how we should be living our lives every day.

Now that I got that little piece of adivce off my chest, this goes back a few years when I was kinda dating (I don't necessarily call it dating because it wasn't anything serious or official). Of course, I'd have deep convos (as I do with everyone I meet) with the prospects and one guy in particular brought up something I'd never thought about. Women with children...he said he would never marry a woman who had a child. When asked why, he replied, cause it wasn't his responsibility to take care of some other man's kid. Let's just say, he wasn't someone I'd like to date. I mean really? It's not your responsibility? It's a deal breaker if she has a kid? Not like it's a good thing, but PLENTY of females these days have kids. Was it a stupid move? Maybe...it depends on the female, BUT it should never come down to it not being your responsibility. If anything, you should want to prove that you're better than the father who left and/or be there for the female under any circumstances.

I think it also goes for the other way around...not that it is seen a lot but if a male has a kid and the mother isn't there...it shouldn't be a deal breaker either.

ALSO, I could see it another way: Possibly he sees it as a milestone that he wants to experience together. having the first child, not knowing what to do, etc. I can honestly say that I do see that; however, if you go to the mall with a girl and then you go to the mall with another girl...is it really the same experience both times? Ok, not a great comparison, but you get my point, right? The experience is not going to be the same every time.

As I'm finishing up here, I got off the phone and thought of a great topic tomorrow: being a closed book. I also realized I open  tomorrow sooooo it's bedtime... gnight all. :-)

Hmm.

This will be short...

Today while I was working...being bored...I overheard an older woman telling her, well, life story through some thin walls. To make a long story short, she and her husband married at 16. They were together for 40-somethin years and in his sixties, the husband wanted a divorce. When asked was she mad at him for wanting a divorce, and her response (in an old lady voice mind you) was "No, cause you can't make someone love you.." Maybe it's just my hormones, but I got a little teary eyed. Then she continued by saying "I am a Christian woman, and the only guaranteed love is the love from God"...powerful or powerful y'all?? It's crazy to think about...after all those years, he still wanted a divorce...so he fell out of love with her...or maybe he just grew to love her then fell out of love. No matter what, God won't ask for a divorce.

Have a good day tomorrow...it's almost Friday!

Why yes I am a genius

**RANT WARNING**

I am a VERY driven person. But I'm also very impatient at being the successful person I know I am going to be. As of right now, I have an Associates in Arts and Sciences, a Certificate in General Studies, a Completed Phlebotomy program (clinicals pending), 2 part time jobs where I am well respected, AND juggling a long distance relationship (so far so good). While I have all of that under my belt, in my mind, I'm no where. If I had my way and I could afford it, I'd be finishing up my Master's degree this summer, but I'm not that priviledged. So, I'm taking the longer way around, and it's constantly pissing me off and screwing me over which sets me back even more. I am honestly trying to keep an open mind and my head high...doing breathing exercises, but a person can only go through so much....ugh.

**RANT END**


Just a few things I thought about this weekend...

I can say that I am somewhat well rounded....actually no I can't...with my friends anyways. (Sorry guys)...Most of my friends are old.....-er than me...haha. So I don't necessarily know what they're talking about most of the time. By that time, I take mental notes and research it later...yes, I know, my nerd/genius is showing. However, I could tell you about the Godfather, Lethal Weapon (all), Rocky, etc. etc....action, guy crap. On the other hand, I've never seen Sleep somethin in Seattle, Breakfast at Tiffanys etc. etc. Now, I will be honest and say I still am a girl and I still have that week every month where chick flicks are the best thing on this Earth, but I'd much rather go to the movies and watch an action movie than a chick flick. I would much rather play basketball than go shopping at the mall. I could spit out NBA stats like it's part of my degree (football and baseball are not that amazing...no joke)...On the other hand I couldn't tell you for the life of me how to do a french manicure, when Brad Pitt/Justin Timberlake/'s birthday is (is it bad I just listed old guys? Can you tell I don't keep up with this stuff?) I guess in the end, this may be why I like hanging out with guys more....we've got a lot in common...(personality-wise)

Nerds/Geniuses are pretty weird if you ask me. They can be smart as hell, but messy. For example, not gunna lie, I know I am a smart cookie...nerd is kinda pushing it, but we'll say I'm a nerd right now. Anyways, I am SO OCD...a huge perfectionist, definitely; however, my desk is a MESS...on the upside, I know EXACTLY where everything is. Weird, right? Next weird thing...if i don't know something that is mentioned by someone I'm having a conversation with, I take a mental note and eventually put it in a notepad on my phone to research later...ask me about it so you can see it....definite nerd status. In a way, I think everyone should do it as you continue to learn and grow in knowledge....you don;t know how amazing it feels to win an educated battle or participate in an educated conversation. With this you have acheived greatness...haha.

So on a side note, I do feel a little better than when I started this post with my rant...but it's still marinating...pray for me this week...it'd be much appreciated ;-)

Have no fear, LOVE is here.

Glad to be back! I've been going through a whirlwind of stress and I coped with it by sleeping it off, keeping myself busy, and avoiding the writing about it deal...needless to say, it doesn't work..ha. So here I am!

This however, isn't necessarily about stress. I was supposed to write this on Valentine's day but I was too pissy...(another story altogether).

I'm gunna get a little mushy...female style cause I think it's a great topic and it's what females (ALL females) do and look forward to: love.

Where do I even start? I believe most people want it...badly. But many are scared by it...as was I. Love is one of the most powerful emotions a human can feel...it was my #1 fear....hands down. In part, I believe it had to do with my experiences with friends. Before the weirdo I'm with now, I hadn't had a boyfriend. While all my friends were out with their boyfriends (or partners...) I was at home, studying, watching tv, being a sheltered nerd. I hated to have those talks with friends about break ups and what not...I was always there to cheer them up or talk about everything...thus I learned from them, but I also built walls to let no one in. I didn't want to hurt like them...and it made me hate the idea of having a boyfriend just to break up when I truly become emotionally attached.

I started my first relationship when I was 19 and it was the BEST feeling in the world to have someone other than close friends and family care about you and WANT to be with you. Just a tad update on that relationship: we're still chuggin along ;-)

Nonetheless when he told me for the first time he loved me and I knew he meant it, my fears of love was lifted. In the end I realized you can't live in fear...you gotta take risks, take chances. If it doesn't work out, it just makes you stronger. Of course, everyone fears having a broken heart, but you cannot live in fear.

In the end, cherish love, do not fear it, embrace it. Love with everything you have...

A few quotes that I love:
--"We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly."
--"To love is like to love -- all the reason is against it, and all healthy instince for it."
--"Love is patient; love is kind; it does not envy; it does not boast; it is not proud. It is not rude it is not self-seeking; it is not easily angered; it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always hopes, always perserveres. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. Love never fails." -I Corinthians 13:4-8

To be continued...